Kwara Camp (Okavango Delta, Botswana)

May 9^th, 2011 (February 2011) – We rose early and made our way to the Namibia/Botswana border. The security situation at the borders is a bit lax, so much so that it is entirely possible we could have driven through both checkpoints undetected. This probably explained why an immigration official on the Botswana side was a bit ticked off when I drove past the office to park the car. Apparently, I could have just kept going with little threat of being stopped. Oops

While waiting for our paperwork an elderly gentleman returning to Botswana asked us for a ride. Actually, it was more like pantomiming as he spoke nary a word of English. We wanted to assist him but we did not think we had enough space in the Spark for another person, at least not without jettisoning some of our junk. He was having none of it. After we left the office he followed us to the car and awaited his chariot. I am sure he could have hitched with the next vehicle to cross but this man was impossible to deny. Age had chiseled this kind soul into a work of art and only the hardest of hearts would have been capable of saying no. 

Lucky for him I'm not  complete prick. So I managed to rearrange just enough space for Mr. Bots and his luggage.....barely. At that moment I felt a little ashamed to have ever said no in the first place. Not far into Botswana he gave us the signal and we pulled off the road to let him out. He was incredibly grateful. However, nothing in life is free. We forced him to pose for a picture.

Victoria Falls (Livingstone, Zambia)

May 17^th, 2011 (March 2011) – It would be reprehensible to spend all that time meandering through Southern Africa and not make an effort to see the largest waterfall in the world and one of the Seven Natural Wonders, Victoria Falls. One might even say criminal. So we made it a point to do so. It then boiled down to a matter of logistics.

Driving from Maun to Kasane (northern Botswana) would have tacked on a few hundred kilometers to Sparky. Not good since it was clear at that point that we were going to demolish the ceiling limit on our allowable kilometers for the month. Neither did we relish the thought of all that extra driving over less than stellar roadways. We decided to give Sparky a respite. It was time to take to the air.

The flights from Maun to Kasane are inexpensive (around $60 US one way) depending on the time of year. Just make sure to specify that you would like to pay less money as opposed to more. When we visited the Air Botswana office at the airport in Kasane to inquire about a return flight to Maun we were quoted a much higher fare than we had received on the flight in. After considering different departure dates the woman behind the desk finally asked us if we would like the ‘special rate’ (i.e. cheaper). No, no. We were hoping to pay the highest fare available…if you don’t mind. Are there any seats left at that the ignorant tourist rate? Good, good. We’ll take that. Would you mind expediting the procedure? We need to hurry back to our hotel so we can burn the rest of our savings. Alrighty then. Thank you so much. I think I’ll go outside and fuck myself now.

Medical Tourism (Istanbul, Turkey)

March 2011 - After Victoria Falls it all started to wind down. We returned to Kasane in Botswana to purchase a return flight to Maun where we would once again hop into Sparky and make our way back to Johannesburg. We loitered a couple extra nights in Kasane so we could relax in the lap of luxury at an upmarket hotel for a spell. It was swell.

Once back in Johannesburg we procured lodging close to the airport for the sake of expediency. We spent a few days tying up some loose ends to include giving Sparky a bath and purchasing airfare. While waiting at the car wash for our car to be cleaned the owner struck up a conversation dripping with racism. The country is overrun with them. We used to play in the streets as kids until they took over. You can't trust any of them. In lieu of getting murdered she and her family are headed to Botswana. Alrighty. We just met this woman. I cannot quite explain why she felt so comfortable bearing her soul to complete strangers. This was not the first instance of such behavior. I guess people have no problem sharing as we are all clearly on the same 'team'.

We left most of our gear at the bed & breakfast in hopes that someone would find a use for our stuff (dinnerware, cooler, gas stove, etc.). Someone was either really excited or really irritated by the yard sale we left behind. We packed up Sparky for the last time and headed to the Avis airport office for what we thought might be a struggle of epic proportions. Over the course of two months we'd involved three separate Avis offices in our shenanigans and switched vehicles in the process. Too much paperwork. Too many employees involved. Too much confusion. And since we'd exceeded our allowable kilometers we were prepared to take it right in the stinker. Much to our surprise the return went smoothly and although we did have some overage payments in the end the representative with which we dealt was courteous, competent, and reasonable. She even waived a few of the charges in light of our constant struggle with Avis over the course of our journey. Ahhhh....refreshing.