Higher Than a Kite - Really Nostalgic Photo of the Day

That is a view. It makes me happy when skies are gray. Hadn't showered for a week. Marinating in a special sauce of body grease and sunscreen. Out of breath from exertion and altitude. Happier than a pig in shit. Existential cocaine. What else can I say?

Donkey Punch - Not So Nostalgic Photo of the Day

Where to begin? When I witnessed this it felt a little like I was watching a crime in progress. And I was powerless to stop it, powerless I say!! PTSD anyone? Does the horse not look like the equine version of a sex offender? The hair over his eyes just feels shady. Like my Pa always said, "Don't trus a horse ya can't looks in tha eye, sonny." What do you get when a male horse and a female donkey consummate their marriage? Not a mule. Nope. A hinny!  Azerbaijan is light years behind other nations on the "Bi-racial tolerance" scale so this hinny is gonna have a rough road ahead. Gives me a great idea for a song: A hinny named Sue. Yes.

Pookie - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

Look into my eyes. You are mine. Come to me. Come to Pookie. Pookie will take care of you. Pookie will love you. You will love Pookie. Don't run away from Pookie. There is nowhere to go. Pookie has you now.

Kiss This - Nostalgic/Baffling Photo of the Day

Circle the church three times. Kiss the corner. Leave a chicken head. Any questions?

Kid - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

No caption necessary.

Corner - Thought Provoking Photo of the Day

What do you suppose is around that corner? Could be anything. Could be nothing. Hmm...I wonder. Only one path. Either you turn the corner or turn around. So which is it? Beats the hell out of me. I'd say keep walking but what do I know, really?

Doll Face - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

Without a doubt these have to be the least sexy blow up dolls I have ever seen. However, I do admire the craftsmanship and attention to detail. 

Have A Smoke - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

I don't know where I'm a gonna go when the volcano blows. Well, in the other direction is a good start. If you think I'm the 'One' (i.e. the Neo of dumbasses) take a closer look and find the writing at the bottom.. There is another. (Cue the Jedi theme)

Rim Job - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

Ever rim a volcano? it's just neato.

Headache - Unsettling Photo of the Day

Is it me or does the dude in the back seem to be saying, "Hey! Yo! Back here! Pick me! Me! Hey asshole! I want in! Me!" It just feels a little rude. Is it easier to stack skulls without a lower jaw or is that just an aesthetic decision? Huh. Maybe I could find an answer on Pinterest.

Lucifer à la Carte - Mouthwateringly Scrumptious Photo of the Day

I cannot, for the life of me, decide which one looks more delicious. The thought of tearing an ear off and dipping it in melted yak butter takes me back to a special place. Nummy in my muther f***ing tummy!! Admittedly, I don't like the way Oscar (the head of the right) is looking at me so in the end I would probably go with his little brother. I don't like it when food smiles at me. You ever get like that? The vendor told me he went all the way to the fifth realm of hell to find these two prime specimens. It shows. Sinfully delicious!

Impotence - Debbie Downer Photo of the Day

I like this photo because I cannot possibly make it funny. It defies levity. It is pathos incarnate and I find myself stirred each time I look. It all comes down to this: That is one sad looking muther f***ing puppy.

Flesh Wound - Nostalgic/Disturbing Photo of the Day

You load sixteen tons and what do ya get? Another day older and your deeper in debt. St. Peter don't ya call me cause I can't goooooooo, I owe my soul to the company stoooooore. Imagine ripping this big bastard apart by hand. It seems a job more befitting the Avengers and yet.......

Split the Twins - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

"Why so serious? Seriously?", he thought with a supercilious smirk.

Tendrils - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

I suppose I could explain what is happening in this photo but, in the end, who really gives a shit? It is just kind of cool to look at.....or not. The content is pretty much the result of serendipity. Receipe: 1) Adjust shutter speed 198 times. 2) Take a couple hundred thousand photos. 3) Hope for the best. Ansel Adams can kiss my ass. Welcome to digital photography.

Fling Thy Self Asunder - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

Sometimes I look at this photo and think, What tha hell is wrong wit choo? Other times it's, I'm glad there's something wrong with you. Am I ridiculous for spending hours alone on a hill top overlooking Lake Toba on the island of Sumatra flinging myself off a rock in search of an ideal photo de catapult? I am not. Why? Because I spent hours alone on a hill top overlooking Lake Toba on the island of Sumatra flinging myself off a rock in search of an ideal photo de catapult. On an unrelated subject, never underestimate an individual's desire for convenient self-rationalizations. If memory serves I believe a leprechaun told me that.

Je Ne Sais Quoi - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

This guy has 'it' though what 'it' is exactly I cannot say. He has it. I want it. Some monkeys call him the space cowboy. Some call him the gangster of love. I just call him Maurice. He is a joker, a smoker, a midnight toker. I bet he gets his lovin' on the run. If a witch turned Don Draper into a monkey this is what he would look like. This face says, "I'm gong to take you up into that tree and **** you into next week." Thankfully, he was only viewing his own reflection in my camera lens. Otherwise, I'd probably still be in counseling.

Fine Print - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

Upon further reflection I realized my failure to notice the asterisk at the bottom of the vacation brochure photo that read simply: *Ocean not included. Oops. I suppose it could have been worse. I could have been on a Carnival Cruise.

Yellow Blade of Grass - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

peek-a-boo shining through

yellow puppy in the dew

solid still with not a clue

what it is I think of you

just beyond two yards of three

I know not what you think of me

but a moment's furtive glance

a gift of random happenstance

though your heart I cannot tame

I thank you kindly just the same

My Three Sons - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

Ever feel like you'll never catch up? Not me. To all my friends that have been spittin' out puppies like a Pez dispenser: Eat this. Meet Wayan, Ketut, and Nyoman. They were bored. I needed a family. Perfect. I've decided to Americanize their names and am leaning toward Larry, Moe, and Curly. Any suggestions on which one I should shave? And don't worry, their mother is on the way. She should be arriving from Russia via FedEx any day now. Fairy tales can come true, it could happen to you...

Ghost of Kuta Beach - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

When I view this photo I think of only one thing: The time a Balinese transvestite offered to give me a hand job on the beach. I went there very early in the morning to get a little artso fartso. Apparently, this is a great time to troll Kuta beach for desperadoes looking to quench their unrequited sexual desire from the previous evening. Just for the record, I declined. He/she/it was entirely too vanilla. I like my trannies with a little more sass.

Cosmic Richie - Nostalgic Pseudo Photo of the Day

This is what happens when you spend fifteen minutes huffing rubber cement right before you sit down for a little photo editing. I would be ashamed if the picture did not turn out so f***ing awesome! I am going to put it on my résumé. Unfortunately, all my nude self-portraits were lost in a flood. Otherwise, this would be perfect.

Kiss My Macaque - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

This is Mabel. I took this picture right before we kissed for the very first time. Tell me you could deny those big smoldering browns. Pure f***ing magic! I honestly thought I found the one until she tried to sodomize me with a banana and threw shit in my face. After that things went downhill though I did my best to look past it. I left my heart in Bali, Indonesia....along with a quarter inch of bowel.  Tis' better to love and lost than to never have loved at all. My gastroenterologist disagrees.

Mt. Batur Reconnoissance - Nostalgic Photo of the Day

This is me on Mt. Batur (Bali, Indonesia) pretending I did not just hit the timer on my camera and certainly did not nearly trip over the side trying to get to the spot in time. Just me squatting atop a volcano for no reason cause that's what us adventure types do, i.e. try to look natural in ridiculous circumstances. This is what super Billy bad ass folks like moi call 'Tuesday'. Squint your eyes just right and it kind of looks like I'm taking the most scenic dump ever.

Next Trip?

Recidivism

"You must have been warned against letting the golden hours slip by.

Yes, but some of them are golden only because we let them slip by." 

-James M. Barrie, novelist and playwright (1860-1937) 

The world is a beautiful place. The world is an ugly place. Ugliness has an advantage. It has a tendency to stick with you. It has a long half-life. Beauty is the underdog. You need to be reminded. It has adhesive qualities but these properties do not weather well the passage of time. This cruel aspect of the universe is not lost upon me and yet, even I, forget the lyrics to the song from time to time. We are not elephants. We do forget. We must be admonished.

Reminders are not hard to come by and are, for the most part, within our grasp at just about any moment. It could be as simple as closing your eyes and traveling back. Or perhaps staring at a photo, clutching a prized memento, or visiting the 'spot' can serve as our time machine talisman. But even with tools of remembrance so close at hand we, as humans, are burdened with the curse of short term memory.

And although the bad times, it seems, have a longer lasting residual presence many of us do our best to induce amnesia. Maybe this helps to explain the lingering nature of negative memories and the emotions attached thereto. Perhaps the harder you try to forget the easier it is to remember. I believe the effort to be a fools errand. The worst of times is the best of reminders. Loss of memory begets loss of empathy, among other things. Without the pain what kind of person are you? Quite possibly an exceedingly dull one I should think. We must learn from our mistakes, misfortunes, and follies. I have found no better way to appreciate life and all of its associated simplicities and complexities. Without the pain joy is nothing more than a neutral emotion. Neutrality is numbness. Numbness sucks.

“Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.”

May 25^th, 2012 – And just like that, in a flash, it was time to go home. Something inside me clicked and I knew the journey was over. It was not really a decision. The journey was simply over. Even if I'd kept globetrotting for another year the odyssey would have ended right there in that cafe on Istiklal Avenue in Istanbul. Continuing would no longer have been traveling, only running.

So within less than twenty four hours of purchasing a ticket I was floating over the Atlantic Ocean, homeward bound. In all I spent 2 years, 3 months, and 24 days exploring the globe. And in the blink of an eye it was finished. But it did not end there, at least not spiritually. I decided to read over and digest all that was contained within the digital pages of my online journal. Along the way I would do a little editing, a few photo adjustments, and included some of the things I just did not have time for on the road. This was my reward for setting aside all those hours dedicated to recording my experience. I could now relive all of it. And so I have.

But that too has come to its inevitable conclusion. For over a year I've mined the inner recesses of my memory for thoughts and feelings that would have been forever lost had I not captured these moments in print. But what now? I do not know. Perhaps, this will be the end of both journeys, the one that terminated over a year ago and the one I've taken since my return. Will I continue to post or is it just over? C'est la vie. Of course I do not want it to be but the decision is not really mine, is it? Just as the journey ended irrespective of my physical location so this chapter may terminate whether I continue to post on this site or not.

.....or am I? (Indonesia to Turkey)

I am but a humble wayward wanderer globetrotting his way across the planet in search of natural wonder and cultural stimulation…..or am I? It has been suggested by some that my feckless circumambulations may be anything but aimless. Perhaps I am gainfully employed after all. Is it conceivable that I would have the audacity to actually suggest what I am about to suggest given the consequences? I am nothing if not insolent…..or am I?

The power of language is undeniable. It is amazing how truly evocative the act of arranging letters in a particular manner can really be. CIA. FBI. NSA. DIA. AIA. ASA. NRO. Betcha you’re not even sure what all of those stand for exactly. Don’t beat yourself up. It does not reflect poorly on your intelligence.

If what I am intimating has even a modicum of veracity I would clearly be out of my f***ing gourd to be writing about it…..or would I? Everyone has a breaking point, the point at which he or she can no longer swallow all the bullpoop and finds themselves compelled to regurgitate. Perhaps I have reached that stage…..or have I?

Go Find Yourself A Nook (Cappadocia, Turkey)

April/May 2011 – So it was back to the 'Bul to rendezvous with Ivan the Terrible. Actually, his name is Dimity, not Ivan. And he is not remotely terrible. Not even a smidge of horrible. In fact he is a rather pleasant bloke. He does happen to be Russian and, unfortunately for him, Ivan the Terrible was the first famous Russian to pop into my head soooooo.....

Dmitry and I crossed paths over a year previous in Nepal in the small village of Kagbeni in Lower Mustang. I had just come out of Upper Mustang and he was on his way to Annapurna....I think. My memory is a little fuzzy. Speaking of a fuzzy memory I did not initially record this part of my journey (my visit to Cappadocia that is). This came at the tail end of my quest and although I fully intended to do so I never got around to it.....until now.

But details of the engagement have faded, shriveled and blended together making it almost impossible to accurately recollect. But alas, I shall give it the ole college try. It is a little disjointed and represents more of a quasi-stream of consciousness attempt to elicit memories from that time than a faithful retelling but I suppose it is better than nothing.

So why bother at all? Good question. As I sat there debating that very point I realized it underscores brilliantly the whole reason I wrote about my trip in the first place: To remember. And had I not bothered to put thoughts to digital ink the whole adventure would be a nebulous blob of discombobulated recollections. Thanks to my painstaking efforts it is nothing of the kind. This is also the reason I've taken the past year to revisit everyone of my posts to add some finishing touches and, more importantly, reminisce. And now anytime I wish to travel backward in time all I need do is clickity-click.

But back to the discombobulated blob. Dmitry had always wanted to visit the Cappadocia region of Central Anatolia in Turkey. My presence provided a suitable excuse to do so. From what I'd read it sounded like a worthwhile trip. We were in.

Proverbial Horizon (Bozcaada, Turkey)

April 2011 – I thought it was time to leave Istanbul if only for a spell. I traded a lair in central Istanbul for a lair on the island of Bozcaada just off the west coast of Turkey. The weather, for the most part, remained miserable and cold with a day of sunshine thrown in here and there. Thankfully, I did not have a hell of a lot of ambition to begin with. In all honesty it felt good to withdraw a bit.

It was Leslie that suggested Bozcaada as she had been there right before meeting me in Tunisia. She arrived during September when the weather was much more pleasant. There were very few foreigners milling about although I did meet a couple of young Turks visiting the island for a few days. I drank tea. Ate jam. Wandered around aimlessly. Took naps. I did almost nothing. I had planned on renting a scooter but the rain and the windchill put the kibosh on that idea. I befriended a local cafe owner and spent some time chatting and utilizing her WiFi. She was Australian born and had been living in Turkey for many years. As you might suspect she possessed a lot of insight into the local culture.

When the clouds did clear for a day or so I finally took a stroll through the Venetian fortress that dominates the small town's skyline. That about does it for traditional tourist attractions. People come to the island to sip wine, eat fish, lick jam, frolic on the beaches, and chilly chill......at least during the summer and fall. When I was there it a felt like a small hamlet that just barley managed to survive Armageddon. Just barely. The weather is what undoubtedly painted this canvas in my head for I am sure that during the season this island is most assuredly downright lovely.

In truth the rain, the wind, the cold all fit my mood. For I knew that my own personal Armageddon (i.e. my end of the adventure scenario) was just above the proverbial horizon. I was not particular sanguine about concluding my sojourning extravaganza. I was a fugitive for over two years and had little desire to reacquaint myself with the general accepted version of reality. But, as hard as it is to believe, there was someone anxiously awaiting my return to terra firma, my mommy. And I knew it would soon be time to venture home. After a about a week of sequestration on the island I returned to Istanbul to rendezvous with Dmitry, a Russian I met in '09 in the small village of Kagbeni, Nepal. He was interested in visiting Cappadocia and I was interested in joining him.