844 days, 20,256 hours, 1,215,360 minutes, or 72,921,600 seconds. That is the approximate duration of my world tour. I never wanted it to end and now, in a manner of speaking, I suppose it never has to. If you wish to go by country do so by clicking on one above. They are numbered in the order I visited them, more or less. If you enjoy reading about it even a tenth as much as I enjoyed living it then you will not have wasted your time. Grab a refreshing beverage, settle in a comfortable chair, and make a journey across the world, experiencing it as I did. Then get off your ass and check it out for yourself. You're not getting any younger.

Monkey Forest (Ubud, Indonesia)

For an updated version of this site, go here.

January 18th, 2009 - I went to Mandala Wisata Wanara Wana (or Sacred Money Forest Sanctuary to the layman) today. It is right in Ubud and is a bit of a tourist trap but it does have monkeys. Everyone wins with monkeys, especially when they are aggressive nasty banana/fruit hoarding little bastards. Inside the forest is Pura Dalem Agung (Temple of the Dead). Unfortunately, I did not happen to see any dead people walking around which is a real shame as I have a lot of questions. Maybe next time.

I refrained from feeding the monkeys as it is clear doing so turns them into raging assholes. However, if I was going to feed the little heathens I would sure as hell buy only the ‘official’ Monkey Forest bananas. Frankly, they are the only bananas I trust and, more importantly, the only ones the monkeys trust. Do yourself a favor. Do the monkeys a favor. Buy the official fucking bananas.


Bill, was this hole here yesterday?

Nice Junk.

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'Love me or hate me, but spare me your indifference.' -- Libbie Fudim